What's new pussycat, whoa whoa whoa

Sunday afternoon and all is well. Is it srange that no one in my family can take a nap without taking their pants off? Absolutely. But others should learn from our example; we have turned the nap into a fine art.
 
Someone warned me not to come back from New York covered in tattoos and piercings. I do not fear that at all. I worry about returning home in a black suit, talking into my cell phone headset while I program my palm pilot. In reality, I do not expect any major changes. And maybe I will  not return at all. I certainly do not think I am the quintessential Orange County girl. How can I be, when I shivered even while writing that repugnant phrase?
 
There is a comedian named Demetri Martin who was featured on National Public Radio, and he talked about the safety of vests. Life vests save you from drowning, bullet proof vests save you from gunshot wounds, and sweater vests save you from pretty girls. Brilliant.